Communication: Here we go again!

Hello again. Welcome to my cyber-corner. There is one question that keeps coming up in my marital sessions (and this question is asked by both male and female) and that question is Why won't my spouse just hear me? If you feel unheard by your spouse, as if what you say doesn't matter, you are not alone. This is very common in marriages. However, if you are looking for a solution, it's important to approach the situation with understanding and empathy. Here are some steps you may want to consider:

• Open a Non-Defensive Conversation: Find a quiet, calm moment to express your feelings without blame. Use "I" statements, like "I feel unheard when..." instead of pointing fingers, which can lead to defensiveness.

• Listen to your partner's side: Before jumping into how you feel, ask if there’s something on your partner's mind. Sometimes, feeling unheard can stem from both partners being too caught up in their own concerns.

• Identify the Root Cause: Is it a matter of timing, too much noise, or emotional overload? Understanding why you feel unheard will help both of you address it more effectively.

• Seek Mutual Solutions: Together, figure out ways to improve communication. This might involve setting aside dedicated time to talk, using active listening techniques, or ensuring that both of you feel respected and valued in discussions.

• Be Patient: It may take time for habits to change, and it’s important to be patient as you both work to improve communication.

  
  

Remember, it's normal to feel unheard at times in any relationship, but with mutual effort and respect, those feelings can be addressed and healed.